Life after orientation
I’m going on the third month of being off orientation. The last month has been HELL. I mean I was in such a dark place. I started distancing myself from work and my coworkers. People were noticing that I just wasn’t myself. I was so overwhelmed. I was BURNT OUT. I started looking at home health and hospice agencies to work at because I couldn’t handle the acuity of my patients. I might as well work in an ICU where patients turn for the worse all the time. At least I’d expect that. I started to change so much. I got written up in the process for something I didn’t know I could get written up for. That wasn’t the straw that broke the camel’s back though. When that happened, it was like …ehh.. what else? I was already so numb to everything.
I ended up talking to a few I guess, “important” people and some others and I decided that I should just stay put. I decided that instead of running away from my hurdles, I should jump over them and continue the race.
I’m now getting more and more confident at work now that I’ve learned to cope better. I’m learning how to ask for help more and to not feel like I have to do this all on my own.
I’m continuing to grow and things are leveling out better. Oh yeah, I’ll still have those horrible nights. But I’ll push through them. I will.
